Wednesday, May 18, 2005
Hell Bent Thoughts
for the past week, i've been thinking about what to do with my current situation living in this country, i miss my freedom and the simple pleasures that i do back in the phils. all that is gone now and i can't bring back the past nor should i wallow in it any longer.
and so, i've decided to take measures. i might leave this country soon, real soon and move to another country, it's a big risk, but i am willing to take it. however, recent events have transpired sealing me to stay here for at least the next eight months. my company really does value me *snicker*. for the past 3 months of working here i've been playing the recent-grad-i-don't-know-anything-guide-me-through-this role, hey, it works, they see me as this kid who just does what he is told *evil grin* i can be very manipulative when i want to, tsk tsk... subterfuge really is my means to politics. it's a good thing people here do understand the meaning of "don't kill the messenger" *snicker*... i was thinking of moving to another company but, with what happened yesterday, i think it won't be possible any longer. this company really does value me, now that i've gotten used to how things are run here *snicker* oh, i think i've said that already *evil laugh*
for now, i think of concentrating in my career, and opt that with the experience i have gained here, i am able to move on to greener pastures... in a few months i will be handling more work load that lets me see how the company works all the more. i can now actually start my own isp company back in the phils if i had the capital. and with the training i garnered and the talks baby carlo and i used to do, i doubt we won't have any problems regarding marketing the company. i do know how to use people's abilities and i can be a scary judge of talent (yeh.. al pacino fan here... my entry.. my say...)
two more weeks 'til salary.. i want an ipod..i need music to ease my stay here. so, that's definitely on my list to buy this coming pay day. i'm also going to start saving cash. i might be leaving soon, so i need to save for future expenses. i can't wait to live with my bro though, hope they'll be successful really soon.. i want to travel with him if ever they go on a nation wide tour... that'll definitely be the highlight of my year. i haven't seen big bro in over three years. i hope i can find a great job (take note, not decent but great) when and if i live with him. hopefully i get my novel published too, which reminds me to read about that certain book in writing this weekend.
i visited a website and this famous novelist said that professional writers write about 20,000 words per day, that's a lot and it takes them 5-8 hours to finish, so far.. i've been writing 10,000 words per day, it takes me 2 and a half hours. of course that excludes the articles i'm posting here. *snicker*
i've been delving on different writing styles lately, as to some of you who regularly read my posts will notice. this article is in another different style. i have to listen to music in order for me to write, the mood of the music is as well the mood of the article, and if i reread the article i wrote with that mood being felt, i feel i have accomplished something.
i can listen to one single track for hours.. although often, i still don't know every words to the lyrics. the tune... there's something about the tune of the music that i choose to play over and over again that soothes me. one of the reasons i can stand to listen to only piano, guitar or what have you musical instruments for hours. although jazz music often makes me sleepy, there are exceptions of course however, most of the time it makes me drowsy.
a friend of mine is here, she is a flight attendant, my parents and i are meeting up with her. if only i could go out on my own, too bad i can't, the culture here is strict, there are a lot of restraints in this country and as i said previously, i miss my freedom. 'till here peeps.. thanks to everyone who constantly reads my posts.. y'all know who you are, my deepest gratitude to all of you. i hope you'll buy my book when it's finished or when it gets published.. (i intend to print the book regardless and have people buy them on my site.. *winks*)
posted by vinz @ 1:04 PM
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